Monday, September 15, 2008

First Descents, Day 6

It’s Friday evening and I’m sitting in the Otter Bar living room. It has been an absolutely wonderful day.

We started the day with Peter, the lead trainer explaining the various levels of risk, and how they move us from ho-hum to adventure to peak adventure to disaster. We ran down a category 2+ section of rapids yesterday. I dumped out of the boat twice. One of our campers, a sarcoma survivor that had to have is leg amputated flipped over in a rapid yesterday. He got hurt and couldn’t get in a Kayak today. It was a huge bummer because he is such a go-getter the whole time, despite a very challenging situation.
Maneuvering a Kayak is pretty much a two-leg gig. You have to use you knees to bank and turn. Anyway, when he was hurt and couldn’t paddle. The lead trainer was very affected by this, and he decided that for today we would run the same rapids, but with less supervision. This was a way to bring up the level of risk and adventure.

I felt pretty tense by the time this talk was over. I didn’t want to miss the two rapids that I couldn’t handle today. So I began preparing my mind with positive focus on the way out. I saw myself coming through the rapids o.k.

We put out, and soon enough it was time to run the rapid that kicked my ass the last time. I spend most of the ride over focusing on how great it would feel to get through it. So I entered it, followed the tongue down through some pretty big tossing rapids, and then I was o.k. I got into a relatively safe zone and raised my paddle in the air with both hands. It was awesome. And such was the case for the rest of the day. I ran all of the rapids without falling. I kept balanced and focused and was totally in it. And after getting through the second rapid that I rolled on yesterday, I was so happy. Before we knew it, we were above the last rapid, and it was almost over.
Everyone got through it. And that was then end of our time on the river.

I wish I could do it again tomorrow. Today I really felt I needed the trainer to go through before I did so I could see the way. Now I think it would be o.k.
For me to go on my own, which was what the trainer wanted us to do, but I felt with my memory, it would be better to go that way. Really once I got into each rapid it was me doing what I needed to get my boat down to then next eddy.

I organized several of the staff and campers to set up Peter, the main trainer, and pour a jug of water over his head. That was lots of fun.

The rest of the day was cool. We listened to Let It Be on the way home. It was so nice.

So tonight has been cool. Sat in the Jacuzzi when we first got back. I took a bunch of pictures and filled out a couple of surveys.

We filled out thank you cards for the staff and trainers and ate dinner. We went back to the training pond and exchanged ribbons. Linda, the nurse gave me hers and said that I had really learned a lot from me.
She felt like if she ever got cancer, she knew how she would respond to the situation. She would take what she learned from what I have done and apply it to her life.

Also, a couple of other people said that my story and poetry and story really moved them. It was awesome knowing that I had affected people pretty deeply. We lit candles for the missing camper. It was a wonderful end to the most awesome day I’ve had in a long time.

First Descents, Day 5

Thursday Morning

I’m hoping you’re doing great. I’m very good. It’s our second to last day on the river with First Descents. We just had breakfast. It’s been great since the first day.

Yesterday was pretty casual. We spent some time on the Salmon River, which passes through the Otter Bar’s property. It runs pretty low in the late summer so we couldn’t kayak any distance. I practiced pointing the boat upstream into rapids and wet rescues.

The boats were talking to me this morning as I was out in the fire break meadow practicing Tai Chi. They want to get out on the river and hit some rapids. Each day I’m more attuned with fun and trepidation fades. We’ve practiced for 4 days and now comes the two days of using what we learned and having fun. We’ll still practice, but we’re pretty much into being on the river and enjoying the ride. I’m very psyched….

Thursday Evening

We’re back from the river, so the good news is everyone is alive. One of my brain tumor survivor friends, Ariella, was able to come along on the raft, but couldn’t kayak. She started to get a headache yesterday and has a long history of migraines, even before the whole brain tumor thing started. Unfortunately, she had to take a Vicodin today and just ride on the raft. She was a really good sport about it, but we all wished she could come along Kayaking.

We put in and immediately hit a hefty rapid. There was a nut missing on one of the foot adjustments on my boat. We discovered that after my boat tipped. I was going to wait for a rescue, but I ended up just popping out. So about 3 minutes into the day, I had a wet exit.
At least it wasn’t because I pulled the safety strap. I was just out. And I got my first oral enema.

Peter, the lead trainer was there as soon as I came up and got me calmed down and on track right away. We went down another rapid and I made it through. On the next one I hit a rock, and was about to get out of it, but one of the other survivors hit me from behind and in I went. I rolled over and hit the rock, and was kind of being punched against it for a few seconds so I bailed. I just missed a wet rescue, but oh well, I came up laughing.

It was a really fun day. We did 3 or 4 more strong rapids and I managed to say up. It was a lot of fun, and again, I was totally there. I didn’t’ have any other thoughts in my head other than I was floating on the river, enjoying the view, or I was on the rapids and trying to follow the smart person. I just do what I can to imitate what they’re doing, and so far it has worked well.

Well, we’ve got one more day and I’m headed back to So Cal and you. I hope you’re doing well. Please send my love to everyone, and if you have a chance, please ask Chewie and Danny if they want to help you call Kari and wish her a happy birthday.

Otter Bar Day 4

Wednesday

It is Wednesday afternoon. I thought today would be the day I learned to roll up when my kayak tips over. Unfortunately I haven’t been able to do that. I got in the water and did some warm-up paddling, going into eddies and with rescues. I’m pretty confident that if I flip I’ll be able to get out without a wet exit, which means I won’t pull the release on my skirt. I’m not, at least this time, going to be able to learn how to roll myself upright. I was practicing rolling up with one of our instructors, Leah. The first basic part of rolling up is using pressure from the right knee to get the boat moving towards being right side up. I was up and down about 20 times, and started to get it, but then my left ear started hurting. The next time I came up, everything was spinning. It was like being on a merry go round. We waited for a little while, but nothing changed. So I decided rather than risk having balance issues tomorrow when we’re back on the river, I would quit for the day.

I just took a bunch of pictures of the group, and after that I tried to figure out how to use Apple’s Garage Band to record an interview. I’m sitting out on my room’s porch. A humming bird is buzzing around a little island garden that’s worked into the huge lawn firebreak that surrounds the Otter Bar Lodge. There is a pretty intense forest fire going southwest of us, and the smoke is blowing in this direction. It’s really beautiful here but it would be nice if we didn’t’ have so much ash coming in.

No one is upset by the fires. We’re all in a really good place by now. This has really been a nice break. I’m looking forward to another couple of days on the river.

Well, I’m off to lie down inside where the air is maybe a bit fresher and then maybe a nap?

Otter Bar Day 3

Today was our third day on the water. We went down 5 miles of a calm section of the Klamath River. There were some moderate rapids, which is a step up from yesterday. I got down the river without flipping over, but I did practice wet rescues a couple of times.

Cory, one of First Descents founders, was coaching me one-on-one for most of the day. I explained to him that my plan was to stay above the surface and not get rescued. Nonetheless, learning to deal with rolling over will doubtless come in handy. I did fine staying stable on today’s small rapids and keeping the boat directed where it was supposed to go. I decided the best strategy was to follow exactly where the instructor was going, to the greatest degree possible. That worked out pretty well. I call this, “Follow the smart person.”

I got through the day pretty well. One of the coolest things I realized about whitewater kayaking is that being on the river totally occupies my consciousness. I don't have any monkey mind chattering in the background at all. When it's calm, I'm enjoying beautiful scenery and steeping in the happiness of the people around me. When I'm running rapids, I'm too busy paying attention to have any time to think about anything else. I also love that other than driving the boaters and kayaks to the river, there is no tangible environmental impact in this sport. It’s about flowing with nature, not dominating it, which is pretty damn cool. My treasured discovery for today is peace of mind.

Otter Bar Day 2

Monday

I just had a great day. We went to the Klamath River and tried out the skills we learned yesterday. I felt like I did a lot better in the river than when we were training in the pond at Otter Bar. But then I had yesterday's grueling trial by fire to get me ready. I'm not as tired as I was yesterday. I can row straight and bank the kayak into eddies and then back out into the river’s main current. We also learned to "ferry" across the river, which brings the kayaker to the opposite side of the river without moving up or downstream. We ran some very mild rapids. It was pretty cool knowing what to do.

It has been a great couple of days. It's been awesome meeting everyone here. I had about 12 people this morning at the Tai Chi warm up session. I start each day with a sense of trepidation, but eventually when we start learning what we're going to do, everything is fine. Every day we learn new skills and push ourselves in a new way. We also spend a lot of time reinforcing the skills the instructors taught us on previous days. The people are great. When we get back from the river, we rest up in the beautiful Otter Bar Lodge. It is replete with comfy accommodations and fantastic food. Last night we ate prawn and scallop choppino with a wonderful cheesy herbed risotto and an outstanding baby green salad. Each salad has had its own special dressing. Last nights’ featured delicious praline almonds sprinkled on top.

The place is the gorgeous manifestation of a family's dream. Peter and Kristy Sturges have built 16 buildings on their property in the last two decades. The Otter Bar is almost completely powered with hydroelectric energy. It is outfitted with skylights and florescent bulbs for maximum energy efficiency. There are backup diesel generators, but they don't get much use beyond powering the pumps that keep the kayak practice ponds full and irrigate the swaths of firebreak lawns that separate the Otter Bar from the surrounding forests. Forrest fires have been burning in this remote region of Humboldt County’s forests during the summer season. Just before the Lodge opened this season there was a fire that came within 1/8 of a mile of the complex. Fortunately the Sturges family has spent many years living in this environment, so they know how to prepare for the worst and come out o.k.


Well, I guess that's it for now. We’ll see what adventures tomorrow brings.

First Descents, Day 1

It’s Sunday evening. I just finished my first day with First Descents at The Otter Bar Kayaking School. It was a very physically challenging day and I'm tired. I started this morning doing Chi Kung warm up exercises with a couple of people in the group. After I arrived on and got settled on Saturday evening, I committed to teach these exercises to help people warm up their hips and shoulders for the unique demands of kayaking. I wanted to give something back to First Descents. I felt so grateful for this generous program for Cancer Survivors that teaches participants to learn about kayaking and challenge themselves to accomplish things they might not have thought they could do.

This morning we got our Kayaks set up and adjusted our other safety equipment. We and were in the water pretty quickly after breakfast. The instructors began by flipping us over and turning us back upright. Once I was comfortable with that, I began learning to roll myself over and not panic when I was upside down in the water. At first it was scary, a real exercise in mental control. I wasn't under the water for very long, but it was just kind of freaky when I first started. I learned how to escape from the boat first, which, the instructors stressed, is the least preferable alternative if you flip on white water. Next I learned how to flip my boat over and wait for someone come in to rescue me. Then I had to place my hands on the bow of the boat and roll upright. I learned to use pressure from my knees and bend my waist laterally to roll the boat upright.

Then we learned how to row the boat forward, turn, and then to bank the boat and turn while paddling. It was a lot to remember so much in one day. The last activity was learning to roll the boat upright on our own if we flip. I ended up pooping out before I could learn. I was so tired that the instructions just weren't sticking in my head. I was also hampered by my build, range of motion and limited stamina. Hopefully tomorrow, I'll get it. The instructors suggested I try a different boat tomorrow. I'm kind of heavy for the first boat they gave me. They though it would be easier for me to gain and maintain speed in a larger boat.

So far, this sure has been an adventure. I've already done things I never imagined I would. I'm having a really good time, and being here really is a challenge.